The many faces of Count Binface
While I’ve been watching coverage of the upcoming Clacton by-election, some of which includes archive images of Count Binface, I’ve noticed that the Count’s appearance hasn’t remained consistent over time. While all of us age over time, so none of us will appear identical in a 2019 photograph to a 2026 one, in Binface’s case the differences are more substantial.
I thought it was worth going through the electoral history to see how many times Count Binface has changed his face, and what this might mean. In each case (except one), I’ll use a photograph of the Count appearing at the (electoral) count, as other photographs are harder to pin down in time.
All images in this article are taken from news organisations, and are used for the purposes of critical commentary, which the author believes to be “fair dealing” under UK law. All images are copyright their respective owners.
2017 General Election (Maidenhead)
The 2017 General Election was contested by Lord Buckethead in the Maidenhead constituency, not Count Binface. I’m not sure why you’re asking me about it.
2019 United Kingdom General Election (Uxbridge and South Ruislip)
Count Binface’s first contested election was the 2019 UK General Election, in the Uxbridge and South Ruislip constituency. Here, Binface’s face is relatively wide, with thin black lines running diagonally downwards, giving the appearance of metal panelling. The “lid” is relatively flat, topped with a small handle. Binface’s suit is light grey with darker grey padding at the knees and elbows, and a black box on his chest.
2021 London mayoral election
Binface’s next contested election was for Mayor of London in 2021. Photos of this count are hard to come by, presumably due to COVID restrictions. From what can be seen from the angle in this Getty Images photo, the face and suit appear to be the same as in 2019.
Notably Binface is one of a few candidates not wearing a face covering here, although it is possible that Recyclons have sufficiently different immune systems that this is not a health risk, or that their faces form natural masks, with exhalations not requiring further filtration.
2023 Uxbridge and South Ruislip by-election
Here we see an entirely new face of Count Binface. Rather than black lines, there are darker grey panels on his now lighter-grey complexion, and the face as a whole is noticeably narrower. The “lid” is now much taller and more rounded. Any handle atop this new lid is not visible in this photograph.
The suit meanwhile appears darker, with the knee padding largely matching the suit colour, and elbow and forearm bracing in a lighter shade. There are also light patches of bracing around the shoulder blades, with small square patches seemingly attaching them to the suit.
2024 London mayoral election
Here we see a closer look at Binface’s face, while much of the suit is obscured.
This appears to be the same face that we saw in 2023. The lid, however, may be different: a seam is visible separating it into a lower and upper part, which was not visible on the 2023 photograph; this may however have been due to the lighting in that image. The lid now has a visible handle, narrower but wider than that seen in 2019. The shoulder bracing and attachment points are the same as previous.
2024 United Kingdom general election (Richmond and Northallerton)
In the general election, Count Binface’s face is not obviously different from the London Mayoral election earlier in the year; similarly, the suit appears to be the same.
2026 Makerfield by-election
After a quiet 2025, this year Count Binface stood against the Prime Minister-in-waiting Andy Burnham at the Makerfield by-election
His face here appears the same as in the 2024 elections; the top of the “lid” is not visible to see if a handle is present.
It may be the lighting, but the arm bracing appears darker in colour than in 2024.
2026 Clacton by-election
Fresh off the Makerfield by-election, Count Binface now faces another by-election, this time in Clacton. (I had a read through his manifesto for this election for a previous article.) Obviously we can’t see the results announcement for this yet, but we can see in this image that Count Binface is clearly in Clacton, so this is up to date for this election.
There is nothing obviously changed here; this appears to be the same face that the Count showed us in Makerfield, and the same suit with it.
However, the Count has reportedly raised £90k in funding, some of which will be directed towards a new suit1; whether this will include another new face and lid remains to be seen.
Conclusions
At some point between 2021 and 2023, Count Binface’s face noticeably changed, roughly concurrently with him acquiring a new suit. Whether there were previous changes before his first political appearance in 2019 is unknown. Some possible reasons for this include:
- Recyclons regularly moult their faces, and the new face that grows back is not necessarily the same as the one that was there before. Little is known about the inhabitants of Sigma IX, so this is merely unconfirmable speculation, until Count Binface chooses to enlighten us on his biology.
- Count Binface contracted COVID-19 during his maskless appearance at the 2021 London Mayoral election. Little is known about the effects of COVID-19 on Recyclons; perhaps a side-effect is sudden facial transformation.
- Count Binface had cosmetic surgery on his face. Who amongst us hasn’t considered having a little work done? If it helps the Count feel better about his appearance, more power to him.
- Count Binface is a hereditary title, and the Count who contested the 2019 and 2021 elections passed away (possibly from COVID-19, as discussed above), being replaced in the role by his heir, who picked up the mantle of contesting notable British elections.
- Recyclons age in discrete ageing quanta, rather than the gradual process that humans undergo. The change seen between 2021 and 2023 is a natural part of the Recyclon ageing process.
Do you have another hypothesis I might have overlooked? Get in touch on Mastodon!